Just the Facts

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I'm a Chronologically-challenged Optimistic Procrastinator with some extra chunk, indescribable hair and blue-greener eyes re-entering into the interesting worlds of College and Caffeine and Self-induced mania. I day dream about Zombies cause sometimes an Apocalypse is less scary than Real Life. I'm a hustler baby and I'm making it all up and I alternately kiss ass and rub it to make my living. BUT Life is still good cause my mom thinks I'm special and people like me; they really like me!

Friday, February 24, 2012

I'm cheating on my Anatomy Lab Group with other, smarter lab groups.

I think we've just drifted apart, really. I mean, they are a nice, friendly group. But...our values aren't the same, and with that in mind, it just couldn't last between us. You see - I want to pass (with an A), and they don't seem to care if they pass (with an A or at all for that matter).

I chose to join the less-than-motivated, non-grade oriented group on the first day of lab. I didn't know! I didn't know. They didn't have any identifiers indicating their less than stellar scholastic qualities. No one did. So when the teacher was moving everyone around and asked if I'd mind changing seats, I said I didn't cause they looked friendly. Aren't dolts less intelligent people and slackers required BY LAW to wear those little silver bracelets (maybe that's diabetics) for social emergencies (like picking lab groups)? Apparently not. Should they be? I think so.

Yes. I'm that girl. I'm sure you've met me. The one completely obsessed with her grade and who is willing to fillet you alive if you get in the way or if I perceive that you're in the way.

Due to situation-al circumstances, I just can't leave. No really, the teacher said we're stuck together until the end of the semester. I'm going to contact him and see if I can be switched, but I don't think it's possible. What poor matyr exists in our class that would love to be put in the dumb, slacker group?

Okay, I'm getting ahead of myself. Why are they simple-minded? Why are they wastrels? Their sluggish intellect is confirmed by consistently, scarily low test scores. Their official confirmation as malingering sloth-children is proven by the following phrase, "Don't worry. We have plenty of time." I seriously have heard this about...a trabillion-zillion-cotillion times. I may start slapping them with formaldehyde soaked cat if I hear it again.

So I cheated. I'm not sorry. I make no excuses. I wandered over to the smart kid group on review day and studied with them. I went to their study group on the day before the test and my scores improved. Now we are dissecting a cat and the main problem is that I have to stay with them. (Thus the threatened assault with embalmed feline.) *Have you all noticed that I am really into parathesis today? Yeah. Well suck it! Our grades are irrevocably intertwined.

Now, I know I'm an anal-retentive maniac. I take everything (especially cheese - not involved with the lab, but I still take it super serious) very zealously. I know that I am a very intense person and intent in getting my way All. Of. The. Time. So. There. I wanna be good, but the Dark Side is calling and I've heard it has cookies. I've been trying not to spaz all over these chicks, but that time is coming to an end. I'm gearing up for a full frontal freak out and they better watch themselves.

But before that happens, as I mentioned earlier I am writing that email to flee from their malingering slack-assery. I don't think it will work. But at least, I can say I tried everything before I produce three more fresh cadavers for the BIO labs.


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